Constructive criticism required
in [UK Motorcycles]
|
From: Monkey on 12 Aug 2010 13:20 "Cab" <rosbif(a)gmail.com> wrote in message news:2231ba98-7c8d-42ba-a292-e0a4e99051cb(a)i31g2000yqm.googlegroups.com... > Not sure if this should be OT or not, as it's vaguely on topic. > > I know we've got a few web savvy bods on the group so I'd like some > feedback on the site I've set up for BRC. Both on the site and on the > grammar/spelling. > > It's all been done in vi or windows write using a template, so no > frontpage rubbish has been added. > > You can get to it here: > > http://www.lanoyeraierocamadour.com Well an easier-to-remember / harder to mistype URL would be a good start. -- ZX6R F2 - The Gravelseeker BOTAFOT #121, BBB #2
From: Domenec on 12 Aug 2010 13:35 On 12 ago, 09:43, Cab <ros...(a)gmail.com> wrote: > Not sure if this should be OT or not, as it's vaguely on topic. > I know we've got a few web savvy bods on the group so I'd like some > feedback on the site I've set up for BRC. Both on the site and on the > grammar/spelling. > It's all been done in vi or windows write using a template, so no > frontpage rubbish has been added. > You can get to it here: > http://www.lanoyeraierocamadour.com - You have to go to a button named after languages to see a popup menu in which you eventually find out what you can see in the site. Fail. Put direct links. - Add strength to page texts with a couple of pictures. - The "special discount for cheeky Dagos attending EOFS" page is missing.
From: des in all probability sticking around for another two months on 12 Aug 2010 13:55 On 12-08-2010, Cab <rosbif(a)gmail.com> wrote: > I know we've got a few web savvy bods on the group so I'd like some > feedback on the site I've set up for BRC. Both on the site and on the > grammar/spelling. 'bien que le plan est d'étendre les vergers...' 'bien que..' is always followed by the subjunctive, so 'bien que le plan _soit_...'. Also 'le plan' is a bit woolly (taking as it does the word 'plan' in French and transposing it to French - not a very nice translation). Try 'bien que notre projet soit...' or even, 'bien que nous envisagions de ...' '.. vous pouvez en acheter un notre Pet Shop sur le site..' Grammatical dog's breakfast. 'vous pouvez en acheter un _dans_ ...' And then the 'location' menu is a calque. 'location' in French means 'hire' or 'rent' of something, and not 'the place where something is located'. I'd call that menu 'plan d'accÚs'. 'Dans le menu sont également proposés des gâteaux (tartes aux pommes, framboises, fraises.......) 'drop scones' (blinis sucrés) , aussi de la creme glacée...' Remove 'aussi' and substitute 'ainsi que..' as this is what you meant. And then, strictly speaking the partitive article needs to be repeated before each noun which it qualifies. So... '... tartes aux pommes, aux framboises, aux fraises...' In the 'tarifs' menu, the months of the year are written with an initial capital - this is never done in French (unless the word is at the beginning of a sentence). One does not write, 'je suis né le 3 Mai', mais 'je suis né le 3 mai ..'. That's what springs out from a cursory look at the site. Otherwise, good French and good agreement in adjectives and past participles. Your wife did a good job. -- des 'If Algeria introduced a draft resolution in the UN, declaring that the earth was flat and that Israel had flattened it, it would pass by a vote of 164 to 13, with 26 abstentions' (Abba Eban (1915-2000))
From: des in all probability sticking around for another two months on 12 Aug 2010 13:58 On 12-08-2010, des in all probability sticking around for another two months <des(a)des.com> wrote: > 'Dans le menu sont également proposés des gâteaux (tartes aux pommes, > framboises, fraises.......) 'drop scones' (blinis sucrés) , aussi de la > creme glacée...' > > Remove 'aussi' and substitute 'ainsi que..' as this is what you meant. And > then, strictly speaking the partitive article needs to be repeated before > each noun which it qualifies. So... Oh, and 'crême' takes a circumflex. -- des 'If Algeria introduced a draft resolution in the UN, declaring that the earth was flat and that Israel had flattened it, it would pass by a vote of 164 to 13, with 26 abstentions' (Abba Eban (1915-2000))
From: Lozzo on 12 Aug 2010 14:49
Cab wrote: > Point of order. In French, it's "poney". You ain't kidding -- Lozzo Versys 650 Tourer, CBR600F-W racebike in the making, TS250C, RD400F (somewhere) BMW E46 318iSE (it's a car, not one of those 2-wheeled pieces of shite they churn out) |